Once I'd ducked inside the car we made our way to the faraway land of Aztec West (mum didn't think we'd make it in time from Keynsham, hence Sarah stepping up to surrogate mother duties) and were the first ones there; massively keen. I was after a PB and desperately wanted to get under 23 minutes before my 23rd birthday. Sarah seemed more interested in going to the toilet at this stage, but what's new.......
The new Aztec West series has taken over from the 'Bridge Inn/Pomphrey Hill' series of last year, thanks to yet ANOTHER housing estate being built over a beloved running route. But with a lot of hard work from Chris, Roger and Keith, a new race has emerged from the ashes and was promising fast times. As a trial for the upcoming fixtures, it was decided that a 'handicap race' would be run to test out the course and soooo that's how we ended up in a rather posh trading estate on a Tuesday evening.
"NOW WAIT!!!" I hear you cry, "WHAT IS A HANDICAP RACE? ARE YOU ALL OKAY?". We are all fiiiiiine. Until about 6 months ago I didn't have a clue what a handicap race was either. Baaaasically, everyone enters their 5km PB beforehand and the 'handicap master' (a lot less gimp-suit than it sounds) arranges the entrants into some sort of order. But not just any order (obviously). The slowest entered athlete starts first, followed by the second slowest etc etc, and the speed-machine blokeys are left coming up the rear (steadyyyy). If the 'master' gets his timings right, teeeechnically everyone should finish at the same time, which is GREAT if you love mass rioting, rugby scrums and mosh pits as 78 people all try to cross the same line. It is actually great though, as it means everyone has someone to chase and I even got to run next to some of the fit male runners for a teeny bit as they overtook me. Wonderful.... ARE YOU STILL WITH ME? I hope I've explained that well, if anyone has a better explanation then let me know.
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| Last year's handicap race finish.... *not really |
Anywho, so this trial was a handicap and I'd entered my time as 23.00. Sarah was down for like 12 minutes 15 seconds or something (haha joking, I think she was down at 19.40 and was banned from overtaking me no matter what). More and more people started arriving, much to Chris' delight, and it was starting to look like a really good race. I'm sure there was an international athlete there? Rich Peters? Thinking out loud... but I'm sure he was there. Being the keeners that we always are, we managed a good warm-up although spent a fair amount of time aimlessly searching for the start line with no luck. Turns out it was just a dot on the floor - WHY DIDN'T WE THINK OF THAT?!?! The only glitch of the whole event - I suppose that's what trials are for, after all. Mum and Rach arrived just in the nick of time to get roped into marshalling; excellent for me as I need constant attention when I'm running and it was a three lap course.
The first runner was down for 31 minutes - so once they'd started I had 8 minutes to spare (are you getting this!?). It was a bloody quick 8 minutes, mainly because I was trying not to think about shitting myself (#glutenproblems) and also because wellllll everything goes faster when you don't want it to happen. Me and a man from another club (god knows which one, but he was very lovely) were both down for 23 mins so started together. Anything under 23 would've been good enough for me, I was gunning for 22.59 so decided to stick behind him for the first lap and hope he was pacing himself well....... Reaching the 1km mark in 4.21 I was right up his arse (LOL, every single time) and I could see mum and Rach. Obviously this meant trying to look like I was having a wonderful time and make sure I didn't look out of breath. It seemed to work and Rach even did a "WOOOOOooooo..." (to fade).
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| No photos of me, but here's Sarah smiling, for some reason. |
The km markers were confusing because there were 3 laps but 5 markers and so just after the 1km you ran past 4km, but you had actually only done 1.6km, or something.... I overtook my mate after the first lap, but was terrified he'd re-overtake me for the rest of the race.
Anyway the second lap was a bit of a blur apart from getting overtaken by Nina, who not only managed to look super-glamorous and cool, but was also TALKING TO MY MOTHER!! This made me very sad, but I concentrated on her perfectly plaited hair and imagined I looked that effortless... Hahahah oh Emma. As it was 3 laps I tried to think of it in miles instead of kilometres, so starting on the third lap in about 15 mins I knew I had to cling on for dear life and not think about how tingly my arms had gone. I was working bloody hard.
Having people cheer you on, no matter how attention-seeking it seems, is actually a godsend. It's hard to pick out voices sometimes, but I'm pretty sure Roger and Chris were at the start of each lap, followed by Alan and Sheila a little further up, then obviously mum and Rach were stood at the 1km/4km ishhhhh. This was more amazing than anyone can imagine (cue dramatic music). Knowing that people are waiting to see you (I should note that they were waiting for everyone, not just me) is suuuuch a good motivator and on the last lap was definitely needed.
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| A difference race and I look HUGE but yay for supporters |
Mum said to me afterwards that it looked like I was slowing down, ohhhh but she was very much mistaken. And also, how bloody rude. Well maybe I did slow down as I went past her, but the last km I actually said to myself "this is like 800m, you can do 800m in less than 3 minutes". Scared of being overtaken by the people I'd ran past, as well as wanting to get to those who'd started in front of me (a bit of friendly competition never hurt anyone), I was genuinely running scared. I undertook someone on the last 300m (rebel), attempted a sprint at the end and crossed the line with the weirdest, numbest feeling in my arms, having pushed myself so hard and thought "WOW this is what Paula must feel like when she's pissed herself during another marathon".
I looked at my watch...
*tension*
...22.21!!!!
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| Classic photo, classic reaction |
I'd finally gone under 23 minutes, by 39 bloody seconds! As I beat my handicap by a fair amount, I finished near the front of the pack and had a relatively empty finish. By the time I'd got my breath back and turned around, that 'mass rioting' that I spoke about earlier was in full force. With a finishing tunnel about 2 metres wide and around 30 people finishing at once, all hell broke lose. Well, as much hell that can break lose at an amateur running race. I was quite glad not to be in that pack (although it was all the fast people so maybe I should be aiming for that), but Sarah wasn't quite so lucky. I'm sure it wasn't as dramatic as I'm imagining, but I'm sure people were being pulled out of the scrum like a building had just collapsed..... Sarah did an AMAZING time of 19.08 and we even had a sweaty hug.
Prizes were given for the fastest man and woman (Jessie did 17 mins something and continues to be one of my running idols), and the two who beat their handicaps by the most got a bottle of wine each... which made me think that maybe it's worth putting down a slower time, beating it by loads and then getting bliiiind drunk on free wine. HOLLAAAAA. But that would only be cheating myself, and wine makes me a sloppy drunk....
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| NON-RUNNING PHOTO ALERT. Mum, Rach and me |
Everyone I spoke to afterwards was really pleased with their times. Overall I think handicap races are really fun in an aggressively-competitive way and a good way of getting a PB if you put down the right time. The Aztec West series is being billed as the 'Fast 5km' and the work everyone has done in getting it sorted has been immense. It's definitely one not-to-miss if you're after a quick time, a good race and to socialise with the friendliest running club in Bristol... Just as long as they find a start sign!
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